The Fake It Till You Make It Trap

In this blog, I will take a short break from addressing the “Women in Leadership” topic. Don’t worry, I have not given up; I am on a mission and I will see it through. However, I believe that it is important to take a step back to see the forest for the trees, in order to achieve better results and alter the approach.

To be honest, I am not sure what it is that I want to talk about today. I am trying to stay away from the current stressing dilemmas; you know the dark spots and bleak thoughts. Let’s see if I can actually make that happen.

What comes to mind at this hour is a sentence a lady said to me a few times over the past few months “are you sure you are doing well? Your demeanor has changed drastically over the past couple of years. You used to be happier more energetic, you filled the space around you with positivity whenever you set foot here, that is all gone now”. Sadly, it might very accurate and very true. Have I sensed that I reflected these newly found emotions into my environment? I have not, I believed I was doing okay and I was able to fake a joyful character.

Okay, this is not the cheerful topic I promised, but I will get there, I think.

The question that I keep asking myself is why do we - by we I mean I - always need to portray the expected façade even though we are no longer feeling it? Is it an attempt to overcome whatever circumstances I am facing? You know “the fake it till you make it” concept. Am I resisting change? Will this different side of me appear weaker and more vulnerable?

I know it is all of the above and probably more. So why resist? Why not see these rough times through and allow myself to live the new experience to the utmost? I don’t know, maybe I don’t like it? I loved being happy, cheerful and positive all the time. Well, this is a new reality, and ignoring it is not making it go away.

Embracing change is fundamental for our being. Change is healthy, unavoidable and comes in all shapes and forms. I don’t mean changing into a negative, toxic nature, I am talking about the changes in my life that are causing these grim reactions.

I have always had a clear map of how I’d like to live my life, and how it will be. I even know who I want to be in my next four after lives, pretty arrogant, I know. It was all falling into place up until a few months ago. Well at least that’s what I thought, it seems it started longer ago than that. Apparently, fate has a different plan for me. Why not? I will not know if it is a better one unless I see it through.

I have been blessed my whole life, it might not have been an easy ride, but a blessed one for sure. I am surrounded by a beautiful, loving and very functional family. I am blessed with a great circle of friends. I am accomplished and I know how to have fun. Maybe this is the problem. I have had it relatively easy and when push came to shove, I froze.

Having a solid plan might not be the safety net it is promised to be. I need to address the challenges that come with this new era. I need to embrace these tough times and change accordingly. The frustrations and disappointments are tough to handle — this is undeniable — and this past year has been full of those. But they are part of life’s lessons. They are the motivators to take on a different approach and accept that I must adopt new ways to keep going and to achieve that happy ending.

It is a journey. It will have its ups and downs. I will go into it with my foot flat on the floor and while I will resist at times, I know deep down that there is no going back.

Here’s to a 2026 filled with adventures, success, failure and everything in between. And of course, my 20 million dollars (well dinars).

I will see you in the next chapter in our “Women in Leadership” series.